Monday me

Yeaaa.
It's starting again. It's Monday today. My throat does not feel good today. So I opt for not to have lunch today. Drinking water should be enough.

Lately I guess I retweeted and tweeted a lot on BTS.
Oh well. Blame this eclectic taste in music. You give me any kind of musics, I can still digest them well. I was searching for their old mvs. And guess what, I found the exact song I heard few years back. Way back before they got famous and I didn't even know their group name. I just remember the music. Recently I started to listen to them again.
You see, good songs, good musics will always bring you back to the roots, to the base.

Anyway, work is still going on like usual. 10 days left before I can finalize all marks. And then, owhhh. I didn't apply leave for Christmas. Because of the key in marks. Damnit. Why must during the Christmas week? I think it has been years since I had proper Christmas holiday.
This year will be different. Many things happened this year.
Am not gonna talk about it or post it here.
It's not something that should be discussed here.

I wish to end my 2017 in a quiet way. Close every chapters and leave everything behind and start a new one in 2018. Hopefully things will turn out well next year.
Am sick and tired of being hurt.
And perhaps this page will start a new thing too. I know I mentioned before everything here were randomly typed and posted. Maybe next year will be more organized.

I hope so, as the main purpose I have this page is just for me to rant and do whatever I want to do. Keep in mind, whatever I share here are something that are meant to be shared. And whatever I feel like I need to keep to myself, I never spill it here.
I still keep them with me and secrets will always remain as secrets
(am good at keeping secrets, ok. This one can be verified by my cousins and friends).
It doesn't mean that I have to tell everything here. Whatever good, whatever I feel I want to share, it will be here. If not, then no.

Arrrrggghhh. Typing this while listening to Drug Restaurant Pomade album just give me that vibe.
*Currently on Escaper*

I guess there are many things running on my mind right now.
Did I mention that I already deactivate my Facebook? Ya, I did, again. Nahhh, not for any specific reasons. It just that I need to concentrate on my work till the end of this semester. Am using only Twitter for social networking, and my email and this blog for the time being.

I'll be 32 next year. Haisshhh. Time flies really fast.
My school friend, Catherine, treated me dinner to Secret Recipe last Saturday (my belated birthday dinner treat).
Thank you, dear friend for always be there for me despite my pretty love-hate behavior. I know this friend of yours which is me, is such an annoying person. 😀😀😀😀😀
That pretty love-hate behavior of mine, I'll reveal in the next post. When I remember and have time to compose the post.

Now, see what years have done to me. Look what you've done to me. 

😚😚😚😚😚😚

Oh wait. 2006 without make up, just bare face. I love my 2006. I always had the thinking of me being too pretty, overly beautiful, and superbly attractive. Hahahaha. But seriously, I was once.
Well, time changes people. So do I.

2017 with make-up. So fake.

😁😁😁😁😁

Have a nice weekend!

When me just being me...
This morning I was like, ok, i will start with marking later on after lunch. Owh yesszerrrr I did the marking, but not come to two hours I gave up.
Muahahahaha
The biggest challenge of being an educator.
Marking and scoring. I have no problem when it comes to calculation subject, but sadly this semester I was given more on reading subjects than calculation.
I marked everything for my calculation subject. And moving on to the next one, I managed to mark three groups only which means 6 reports.
And guess what, I have 142 essays to read and score, 30 infographics to mark, 36 reports to read and mark.

 Don't be fooled by these stack of papers. It looks ok in the photo but wait till you have them in hand and count them.

And I just have no idea where to begin. It is always the same problem when it is nearly the end of the semester.
Dear motivation, please do not leave me. Be by my side for these two weeks. Am begging you.
Huhuhuhu😢😢😢😢😢😢
Another problem when doing work in the office is this pc/desktop. See, I have problem doing few things at the same time. When I work, I hate to be distracted. In this office my main distraction is my own desk, my pc. Its keeps calling me to surf YouTube.😁😁😁😁
Seriously.
I think the ICT department should temporary disable the internet connection during this hour. (Think, but please don't do this to us. Hehehe)
Hehehehe (Bulak jak. Eksen jak. Kelak mun benar ICT stop internet time tok, alu mohaaaa😛😛😛😛)
So what I did is just put aside my work and begin to type these things. Hahahaha
It's ok. I plan to bring that 142 essays back home later. I'll do them this weekend.

Oh Christmas! They already put up the Christmas tree here at the academic department. Exchange gifts session will be held in another two weeks. The students did caroling here last week.

It may look simple, yet so meaningful

Christmas mode is on!

Fireeeee (BTS) 👏👏👏👏👏👏

P/s: Was listening to Macklemore albums (all three albums) and Drug Restaurant's today. And it's raining heavily out there. Kuching! Oh Kuching!

BTS Fever

It's a fever.
Still can't moving forward. Watched their performance on American Music Awards 2017. They were awesome. Very good! Except that the production muted the fan chants/ screamed or whatever they called it. But overall, it felt overwhelming.

Looking forward on Mic Drop on The Ellen DeGeneres Show.
Loving their fancam on Jimmy Kimmel.

#BTS "Go Go"

Hukh hukh hukh. Ehhemmmm
Sorry.
I was accidentally watch the video on Go Go last week.
See, I love watching people doing public dance cover. And I found BTS "Go Go".
And seriously, it captured my heart. The dance routine they did. Only after that I searched for the mv by the original group. BTS. Call it whatever you want. Before this, I already know the name, I remembered them by the name Bangtan Boys (they have quite a number of names) but never really listen to their songs. I know Fire, but never watch the mv. (Only recently I started to dig into YouTube and watch their mvs)

Then last week, I discovered "Go Go". The public dance cover done by Yours Truly. And I was like, auuwwww. The music immediately hooked into my mind. Few days after the discovery, then I watched the mv. It was awesome. Seriously. Not long after that, the name BTS went crazy. I was like, am I that lucky to discover them just before the name goes wild? Hahahaha

Now, am looking forward to watch them appear on famous live shows in the US especially MTV AMA 2017. Everybody loves MTV. I mean, who doesn't?

And I watch them like a proud sister on YouTube. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

ARMYS? Aaaaaa. Nope, am not (Well, am trying to make my friend into one. Hahahaha). Am not at that level yet (since I have eclectic taste in music), not qualified to be called as one. Anyway, wishing BTS all the best and hopefully this will be a good start for them to be recognized as one of the best band ever in the world. Globally. And to all ARMYS worldwide, you are the best! BTS can go really far as they have a strong fan base.

💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗

(Sources: Google Images, Twitter.com, #BTS)

Stuck on me

I have things to tell. I have things to write. But it seems like I can't get out of all those things from my mind. 

They stuck there.

My very first CARLO RINO

Hehuhehuhehu
Thank you to Susie and husband and son for the birthday gift.
My first Carlo Rino. Cute.💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

Unboxing the gift

Minum-minum and chit-chat before saying goodbye

Thank you once again.🙇🙇🙇🙇🙇

P/s: Cluse, please... Anyone? Yuuhhhhuuuu😁😁😁😁😁😁😁

Happy birthday, Moon!

I told myself to write something on my birthday. But I end up with nothing as I wasn't feeling well on my birthday. Sad haaaa...

Thank you to all who wishes me on my birthday. In fact because I posted up the celebration two days earlier than the exact date, most of friends and family wishes me earlier. Hehuhehu

Thank you to cousins (Kak Zeti, Kak Jalot, Bujang, Hana, Aizat, Tyrah) and family for the surprise birthday celebration.
And we also celebrated my auntie and uncle wedding anniversary. Yuhuuuuuu!!!!
💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

Terharu😚😚😚😚😚😚

And also to my mom. Huhuhu. I know I don't and I have no idea how to express my feeling. I always love and care for you although I don't show much. I just don't know how.💗💗💗💗💗💗💗

And.. The ANDs never ends. Hahahaha

I give you photos. I have to go after this. Attend Oath Taking Ceremony for new students at 10am.

 Happy 40th Wedding Anniversary, auntie & uncle!!!

From cousin's perspective

From my perspective

 The moral is NEVER LET ANYONE TAKE YOUR PHOTO

😅😅😅😅😅😅

Makan-makan time!! We had spaghetti, soto bandung, dhal ayam and later I update again

Photo with families

Let's talk THURSDAY

Gosh. Thursdays will be hard for me this semester. Packed schedule on this day. And it is also an indication where you have to be careful when communicate with me. I can be very unpredictable on this particular day.

For whatever it is, dear Lord, give me the strengths to face Thursdays for these three months. Do not let me to be crushed down by any negative emotions or feelings. I just cannot afford that....

Photo credit: I didn't remember from where I get this photo. It was once on my FB. Since I deleted most of my albums and photos containing my images and also my family images, I save this somewhere on my pc.

Revert back

I reverted back the title of this blog to Appaz's Place. It's hard for me to ignore that name and using Comma... Dot. I started off this blog as my personal place and hence using the name as the title. So, that's all.

Is this some kind of announcement?😙😙😙😙😙😙

"After my death, I will let fall a shower of roses. I will spend my heaven doing good upon earth. I will raise up a mighty host of little saints. My mission is to make God loved..."

~ St. Therese of Lisieux~

Whoever come across this page, may you receive the sign that you truly needed. May you find the right way in finding your path. 

👼👼👼👼👼👼

 

Sneak peek - Work

Okayh. Still hard to find time to update myself here. (lame excuse)
Let's take a peek on how my schedule looks like this semester. Currently am using this one. Still need few changes here and there since my research day is still TBD. Schedule packed.

Taaaddddaaaaaa

Work till you drop.

👊👊👊👊👊👊👊👊👊👊

Here comes October...

Hola!

Nothing to type. Just that I feel like I need to type something. But since the surrounding does not permit me to update, hold this first. Will update soon.
Just start new semester today.

Ya ya ya
Am back at work.
👏👏👏👏👏👏
After on two weeks holiday, here I am.

Another thing is have a blessed journey in this month to all Catholics out there.
It's the month of rosary. As for me, I try to do my best to not miss any single day reciting Rosary prayer. Pray for me so that I may do well till the end of this month. And I pray that you will end your beautifully too.
🙇🙇🙇🙇🙇🙇

P/s: My birthday is on the October 17th. *cough cough*
Hadiah (gift/present), please...😄😄😄😄😄

Don't...

For now, just leave me alone.

Do not try to find me or even contact me. Just leave out from my sight.

I don't think I want to talk or see you at the moment.

Until when, I just don't know. Give me space.

I need time to be alone, without your present. It can last for a day, a week, a month or years.. I don't know.

All I know is, just don't......

Crushing me down

Thank you for crushing me down. The dream I had before was crushed down once again yesterday. Keep on repeating. I always dream of one big family, just like other people. And yet dad crashed them down again. Not once not twice, more than that.

I don't think I want to get involve anymore with any of them.

Seriously.

This is the first time where I feel like I just don't need any of them anymore. Why should I stay when they keep on crashing me? My dream? I thought things changed, but am wrong. Again.

I tried to fit myself in into this Jimmy's family. I thought everything is getting better. It turned out worst. I don't think they feel or have the same dream as mine. Dreaming to have a better family relationship, where everyone can just talk to each other, spend time like other family, get closer and get to know one another. Instead of all those things, we all drifted away. And it is always the same problem. Scandal and women. Reason? The same all reasons. Everyone is not good to each other, for one another. It turned out like toxic. So I guess all the time we had before this they were all fake. For the sake of the public eyes and the people surrounding us.

I guess, mom is correct all this while. Now I understand everything. Up to this point, it all makes sense. Mom was just trying to protect me from all these troubles. She keeps on telling me not to get close to dad and his new family. Me as myself, the desire of a child to be closer to her dad, and I did all I could just to get to know them better. The people I didn't know for almost half of my lives.

And what I get in return, Dad is always the same, I guess he will never change. The more I be closer to them, the more I get drifted apart. The more I get to know dad, the more uglier the facts I know. The more I try to understand them, the more scarier things I found.

With all these things that happen, am glad mom got divorced by him long long time ago, when I was 6 years old.

I had lived my life hard than the rest of the people I know. And I don't think I want people to make my life harder than before. Am done with all this. And am glad God has never once abandon me despite all those things. Because of all these things, I value my mom and our lives together more than anything else.

It is better with things just between me and mom. Without the present of dad....

#Shatteredmanytimes
#Theend
#Stoplookingforme
#Ihadenough
#Amdone

Thank you

One of million reasons

I love myself

Bonus! Bittersweet: Capital E

Bonus! Nahhh. Forever awesome. They are still awesome.

(Source: YouTube - RAKUFEST)

Drug Restaurant: Pomade

Finally, I've been waiting for this. Didn't see this coming tho...
They were known as JJY Band before changing their name to Drug Restaurant.
Accidentally found them on YouTube and I just fell in love with their music. Am sorry not so sorry, but they remind of Arctic Monkeys. And also one of the Indie bands here in Malaysia. Can't remember the name, I'll update once I found them.

Now, let's talk on POMADE. I listened to all their songs already. This album has its own style. Suprisingly, all English songs this time. Which is such a bonus for people like me who don't understand their language but loving their music. Heh. Nice try for those who come from countries which English is not their medium of instruction. I know, the band were criticized on their grammar and vocabs and everything. As for me, music has no boundaries. Forget about the grammar, forget about the vocabs. It's worth for a try than they keep their talents to themselves.

The song Catwoman is good. Sorry to say, it reminds me of Redline '95 by Shizuka where they added Meow Meow. Chicky. Hahahaha. Drug Restaurant's Catwoman sounds sexy. At least that's what my ear told me. 

Ain't I Good To You gives this melancholy feeling. I could feel the sadness. I guess the lyricist is being honest about his feeling. 

The song Starved got me rebel. Hahaha. It brings with the rebellious thought. You know, you act naturally, with your pure attitude, but then people keep on misunderstanding you because it is just the real you? Did you get it? 
This part caught my attention.

"I am brutal like the BIG SHOW
But I'm not like the Texas killer
Who's gonna think
That I have an amazing heart"

Does he refering to The Big Show? I mean, The Big Show from World Wrestling Federation? That amazed me. The whole song sounded like it was referring to the lead vocalist, Jung Joon-Young. Sorry, I haven't check out who's writing whose on every song. 

Overall, thumbs up for trying to come out with an English album. It must have been hard for them to get place in their country but for loyal fans, I guess this is a bonus. Hopefully next time, they will improve more (if language is really matter to some of the fans). 

Heard that they will go on tour starting this September. I checked Jung Joon-Young's twitter. Not sure if that's his real one since I don't use instagram. 

The cover album looks like this. Should be.

 The tour schedule. For updates, I think better to check on his instagram or Facebook page. The information should be there.

 

 (Source: Twitter)

Damnit seriously. How I wish I can attend any of their events. Looks promising. 

Leaving you here with their mv for the song Drink O2 in The Water

 (Source: JUNG JOON YOUNG OFFICIAL YOUTUBE)

Wishing Drug Restaurant all the best in whatever they do. Hopefully can hear more from them soon. 

*Update: The Indie band from Malaysia that I mentioned above is Bittersweet. I still remember their song called Capital E. You guys should listen to it. 👍👍👍👍👍👍 Bittersweet music style and Drug Restaurant is almost similar. Not the same but they do gives the same vibes.
p/s: Really miss the Indie scenes in Malaysia.

Late post Raya 2017

Forgot to upload these photos. Need no elaborations. Too lazy to type.

Now you have the idea on how we celebrating Raya in Sarawak. I guess, as for our families, we celebrate almost all Malaysia festive seasons except for Deepavali. None of the family members marry to Indian. 

😃😃😃😃😃😃😃

Church Wedding & Reception

Congratulation on your marriage, dear nephew Chris and wife, Defnie! Hu! Hu!
May your journey fills with blessing. Amen.

We attended the church blessing ceremony and also the reception. So here are all photos I had compiled.

The Couple. Cute. He was just a little boy before this. And I can't believe he is this big and married already. Huhuhu

The Wats Going On things during the church ceremony

The Wats Going On things during the reception

Uncle and Auntie Ros, Kak Zeti and husband Ijam, me and Kak Zeti and Aizat

With cousins and relatives, feat. Cuzz Acie, niece Krisha, nephew Danial and Dawish

Talking about family. Families

Father with all his siblings and brother and sisters in law. Except for Auntie Delima was not in the photo 

Lastly, almost all here. Aaaaaa. A must photo and don't know whose turn to get marry will it be after this.

Happy Wedding Day!!!!!

Makan Makan

So, my cousin hosted makan-makan yesterday at home. Open house for her co-workers and also few friends of whoever at home yesterday.
(Gosh, I was working yesterday).

When we have makan-makan, of course we have foods. Here are the photos.

The Menus
1. BeeHoon Belacan or is it Belacan Beehoon? Whichever you like. Hahaha. (Do I have to translate this one?) If translated it's something like Rice vermicelli in shrimp paste gravy. Yup! You read that right. My favorite. Seriously. But only when my auntie cooks it. Other people, I don't eat. They are not expert like my auntie when preparing this dish. Seriously. 
And I would like to proclaim this one although am not too sure about it. BeeHoon Belacan can only be found here in Sarawak, especially in Kuching. This one am not sure. But so far, I can't find it at other parst of Malaysia. Dunno lerrrr. The ingredients and how to make? Heh, malas. I don't want to type or reveal it here. I would like to consider this recipe of my auntie is a SACRED and TOP-SECRET one. The tastiness and the deliciousness of the dish is lies on that one and only main ingredient. I know you can Google the recipe, but trust me. My auntie's recipe is the BEST IN THE WORLD.👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍💖💖💖💖💖

Nahhh, eat the photo only. Hahahaha

2. Soto Bandung. This one is a bit ironic. Hahaha. It's not exactly Soto Bandung like the one in Indonesia. This one has been modified by my cousin's wife. The original one, the chicken is fried, but my cousin's wife, she boiled the chicken. It actually good as it cuts off the oily part of the dish. The original recipe is passed on to her by her brother's wife who hails from Surabaya or Bandung, Indonesia. I can't remember. This Soto you can never find anywhere else. One of the best dishes we have in the family. Recipe? Nope. Email me if you want the recipe.

Photo photo photo

3. Kari Dhal Daging + Nasi Putih. How to translate haaaaaa?? Beef Curry with Dhal? Hahaha. And white fragrance rice. Marvelous! Superb! 

💃💃💃💃💃

  

Ok. Let's wrap up. None of the above are mine as I was working on that day. Saya pulang rumah terus makan saja. 

😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁

Hari Raya 2017

Gempak. Hahaha. Cikgu Leha made open cubicle day at her cubicle in conjunction of Hari Raya. Hehuhehu

Basically, all photos above are the same. And do not ask me the name of the cakes. I only know Kek Lumut (fully green color), Kek Hati Parek (the one that looked dark/black), Kek Lumut Cheese (the top down looked green, middle white), Kek Pilih Kaseh (the one with dark brown color and looks like little dot dot there) and oh yesss Spaghetti. The rest with layered I have no ideas what are their names. Hehehe. And onion crackers.

Kek Marble Cheese @ Marble Cheese Cake

Got the recipe from my cousin too. Tried to make it marble, but didn't turn out well. Hahaha. The other cousin said, it was supposed to be like the one that I baked, but I thought mine was not marble enough. The spreading of the cheese was not equal to all sides. The most common way to bake this cake is to separate it into two parts: The base would be the chocolate, the top part would be the cheese. The previous cake didn't use any flours, but for this cake you have to. This is also a steamed cake.

Marble Cheese Cake (Use 10 x 10 baking tin/pan)

Ingredients
 
For the base:
560g butter (unsalted)
100g cocoa powder (I put a little extra of 20g, but 100g supposedly to be ok just nice)
500g fine sugar (I cut off a little bit 470g is ok. 500g is just fine.)
6 eggs (Regular size coz my cousin helped me to buy)
350g tepung Hong Kong or they called it Water Lily Flour (That was what the Google told me.)
A teaspoon of ovalette

Method of preparing:
1. Beat (using electronic mixer) butter and sugar together till it gets creamy. (not to fluffy). You have to agak-agak. As long as the butter and sugar mixed well and gets a little creamy, it's ok.

2. Then add on eggs one by one, Water Lily flour and cocoa powder. Mixed them well using electronic mixer too. Add ovalette too so that the base won't be dried.

3. Pour into the baking tin. Do not forget to grease the tin using butter.

As for me, I greased mine with butter and put the baking paper to avoid the mixture from sticking to the tin. Top the tin with aluminium foil. Steamed for 1hour and a half. Do not steamed till it get fully cook. Just enough that when you pour the cheese on top, the cheese will not sink down. Unless you want to try to create the marble like mine, I steamed the base for about an hour. But the problem was the cheese sinked more to the middle of the base because the base was not that cook enough to support the cheese.

For the top:
1kg of cream cheese (I used Anchor cream cheese. Do not 100% defrost the cheese. Let it be a little sticky when you beat it later on)
255g of fine sugar (If you don't want it to taste sweet, reduce the sugar. I reduced mine to 245g)
1 teaspoon of vanilla flavor
50g of corn flour
2 eggs
4 tablespoons of sweetened condensed milk (Enough with 4 tablespoons. If you add more, the cheese will lose its taste)

Method of preparing:
1. Beat cream cheese and fine sugar till it gets creamy.

2. Add on eggs one by one, vanilla flavor, corn flour, and sweetened condensed milk, till everything is well mixed.

3. Remove the baking tin from the steamer, then you pour this cheese mixture on top of the cocoa base. Top off the the baking tin with aluminium foil. Put back into the steamer and steam for about three hours. Do not exceed the time when you steamed it. We don't want the cheese part (the top part) to overcooked as it will be easily cracked.

Marble Cheese Cake: The End Result

I told you, it didn't look marble. Huahuahuahua. The cheese mixture sinked more to the middle part as when I poured the mixture, the base was not cook enough to support the upper part.

Additional photo:

Can you spot the Marble Cheese Cake here? The one in this photo was made by my cousin. Most of Marble Cheese Cake here in Kuching looks like that. Easier to make and it looks presentable, rather than trying to create the marble look and turns out not so marble. Hehehe

The green cake is called Kek Lumut. Lumut means moss. Its called Kek Lumut because of the color looks like moss.

The one with red-cream-green color add on choc chips is Watermelon layered cake or known as Kek Lapis Tembikai. Seriously, it tastes just like watermelon.

The one with orange-cream color is Orange layered cake or known as Kek Lapis Oren. And, yup, it tastes like orange. Hehehehe

The one with yellowish-cream-choc color is India layered cake or glamorously known as Kek Lapis India. It used coconut grated, Cadbury chocs and many other ingredients. I can't remember.

P/s: Do you see my Holiday Inn cake there? 🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈🙊🙊🙊🙊🙊🙊