September 2013, 30th

A-aaaaaa... Waiting patiently for the person who responsible to key in the mark for my students. I have one more class today at 2pm until 4pm.

And later at 7.30pm, I'll start my Sign Language Class. Should start last week, but due to certain things, I have to postpone till this week. And and and... I just don't know what to do because it's Monday.. (lame excuse).. By the way, my state Sarawak draw in the match with Sime Darby last Saturday. Ya ya ya, I did watch the match on tv.. At the end of this week, will try to get ticket to watch the game at stadium. They play at home this week. Hopefully they will win the match. Cross-finger. They really got the Perak team out from the list. And and and..... They suspected it was already plan by bookie. Never heard something so stupid like that before. Everything that a Sarawakian done (It's either in team, or individual, or the state) seemed to distract other states especially the Semenanjung, except for Johor DT, I guess... Sound racist, haaaaaaaa.....

I'm not trying to fire up the racism thing, but it is totally obvious. Don't know how they see it as a threat to them. Call my mom for a minute.

Everything is fine. She just reached home after went to the clinic for regular check-up for diabetes and hyperventilation.All fine. Glad to hear it.

Oh-now! I really need my father to support me with my tyres, my car tyres.. I can't even afford to buy new ones because of what I earned here. But I feel grateful for I have a job when to compare to other graduates out there. Hopefully father will support me this month. At least support me so that I can change my tyre.. Hehehehe.. It is so costly, around RM205 for one tyres.. I need to change two, so around RM450-480 including the allignment and everything.. Hahahahaha!! I wonder how I can tell everything here, but having difficulty to say it out.. Oh my gosh...... It wouldn't be hard for me if I don't have my car, but car is essential for mobility. And as for me and my case, I need it for me to go to work. How I miss my student's life where I just study, enjoy around and not to worry much on money as I can always have my food at home or just eat Maggi (instant noodles)....

Life is tougher than what it looks like. The more your age increase, the more the unseen things will start to visible to you. What a life....

Out for lunch.

In now. Postponed my class to Thursday. I went to the loo just now to pass urine.. hahahahaha!! Smells like stink bean because I had it yesterday. Ohhhhhh, what a shame!! Malu malu!! Luckily no ones using the loo except for me and my friend.

She screamed," Dik makai petai kah???" (U eat stink beans???)

And me, "Hahahaha! Yaaaaaaa!!! What to do... :) "

This is how the stink bean looks like.. We called it, "PETAI".

 

And this is how it looks like after you separate the bean from the skin. (Taken from google.. This picture is by PeterTan.com)

And this is how it looks like after been cooked. And it is exactly the same way like my auntie's cooking. I tell you, it really taste gooodddddddd... With those chunky anchovies and squid... Totally superb!

 

And this is how people normally react when they come into the toilet after you did your business in there. (I took from google... Picture from Superstock.com)

And that's why they called it, "STINK BEAN".

IT TASTES GOOD IN THE  MOUTH, BUT SMELLS PRETTY BAD WHEN YOU DO YOUR "TOILET BUSINESS".

Yesterday is a past..

At last, I've been through the interview.. So I feel light and alive now... Hahahahaa

First of all, thank you dear God for letting the word of wisdom coming out from my mouth. At least I didn't look stupid during the interview.. Hehehehehe

For those who will be having their interview for Pegawai Tadbir dan Diplomatik, I wish you all the best. Take time to answer the question and keep calm. Follow all the basic dress code and the ethics.

If you are a candidate from Sarawak, make sure you know what is going on in your state. Read on the state's big project and development. For example, SCORE and renewable energy. Read the policy that related to the degree or master degree that you have. What else? Although you can answer all the questions asked, don't put high hope that you will get the post. Your chance is still 50-50. If it is meant for you, no matter what happen, you will get it. If it does not meant for you, no matter how hard you try, faham-faham lah...

And all of all, sit back and relax after you gone through the process. Resume back to your current life. And wait patiently for the result..(although we seemed to know what to expect there... hahahahaha)

Second day

I don't expect much from them. I've been in the same situation before, so I really try to be moderate so that we can have that one way flow only. And I also to brush up on the knowledge that I have. Need to update it. Hopefully after this week ends, I can get back to my on track.

Popped out question: "Will you be one of my bridesmaid?"
And me: "Seriously? That means I need to diet!!"
Next big event: May 2014.. (Thank God I still have time to reduce weight.. hehehehe)

Fresh starts for this semester

I know... But it didn't start well tho... I have problem with my car.. Errrgghhhhhh... So a bit late to attend the class. So today I am a passenger in my uncle's car.. Wala! Whooaaahhh!!! And went into the class, seeing somewhat 100 plus students waiting for me. And I just didn't know what to do.( I know, I used too much "and" and "so"..) So I just did all the basic things. Taking their attendance, split them into 2 groups, telling them what the do's and what are the dont's in my class. This time I have to be firm so that everything will go well. I love this class because those from Semester February 2013 attends this class. I like their energies. So it will help to balance between them and also the batch from Semester June 2013. You know, there will always the pro's and the con's. Positive vs negative.. The Yin and Yang.

Guess what?! My interview is on this coming Thursday. And I just don't know where to start and how to start. Seeing something that I really want and yet I just don't know where to start. With this attitude, I guess God also won't help me. Dear God, please show me the way. I'm lost.....

Yeeeaaaayyyyy!!!!

It's Friday! It's Friday! Without realizing that times fly in a blink of eyes.. I had that Hazelnut coffee and it tasted goodddddddddd... Smells niceeeeeeeee

September 19, 2013

First class for today was at 8am this morning. And the second class just finished at 2pm.. Gosh, I still have no idea what to teach. Morning was just nice.. I know what to teach, I have the idea but I still need to do revision from the notes that I have. But the second class, Sociology in Education~~~~ I don't remember anything about it. I did learn before but that was 4 years ago.. Can't recall anything...

This one is totally awkward... Goshhhhhh... Awkward yang I can't terima. Hahahaha!! Shitto! Why must it happened here in Malaysia? Hahahaha!! I wonder how, I wonder why... I don't mind at all, I respect everyone. Tapi mulut-mulut rakan-rakan "Gossip Girls" ya nak ku sik berapa berkenan. Kat depan memanglah ok, tapi esok lusa berbisik-bisik mengata orang. Acehhh cehhhhh.... Terkena aku ngan environment nak sik berapa tahun tok demi mencari rezeki. Last year berhoneymoon aku di tempat kerja aku. No one cares and I just love how the environment uplift our inner. Waisehhhhh... Sikap orang Malaysia nak ketara: 1. Suka mengumpat and mengata. Baik di depan, but once you turn your back, they will start to talk.
2. Suka mencampur adukkan hal personal and hal kerja. Damn it coz I don't favor this one at all.
3. Suka menjatuhkan orang yang berada di atas. Kes jeles lah selalunya.
4. And I love myself!

It's not easy to be me......

This is what I received today.. It's not final yet... My teaching schedule for this semester.. What to say.... Hopefully there will be no more add-on next week. I'm totally packed starting from this coming Thursday until one week before Christmas.... 

It's 9.41am, August 18th, 2013

And it feels like hours... Waiting for our turn to be on duty at 2.00pm today.. The most thing I miss about my old place is where no one really cares about you.. You are freed to wear anything (as long as your dressing is proper and suit your profession), you can do whatever hairstyles that you want, and you have the freedom when doing your work (as long as you don't skip your teaching hours). And the best thing is we really have freedom to do things in our own ways. No one "sebok-sebok" on you... Can't believe it tomorrow will be having the first class. And I am not prepared for it.

And the mark for my students will be released after 26th September 2013. Hopefully it will be going well. Cross finger. And now ( I know, I used the word "and now" frequently...) 

 Now, can give me at least a little space for me to breath? Where no one will look at me with "that type of look" when I do something to my hairstyle? Or dressing? Press the freedom button! The thing here is that they care much about us where sometimes we really need our own space.

I just realized that....

1... I need to study hard for this coming interview... It's tough.. I browsed around to look for the sample question and also to see the experience of those who went for the interview before... And it left me confused.. Am I doing the right choice for putting this job as my first choice in my application system before?....

2... and here comes Friday. I just noticed that today is Friday. That means I can sleep till noon tomorrow.. And it will be a long weekend till Tuesday (back to work).

3... we can only be friends. I guess it's better to keep it in that way because in that way, I can tell him anything, from A to Z. The feeling keeps on fading away. The moment I thought it fades away, the feeling of wanting to be with him keeps on coming back. It's a platonic love, that's how I define it.

4... I speak well with others whenever they come to me by bringing their positive energies around. If you come to me with this serious face and moody sort of attitude, you will get cold-effect from me too... New word we had learn earlier during the academic meeting was "Cold-Storage".

5... God gives me more blessings and I am totally grateful with the brain that He gave to me. Please continue to guide me, dear God.... And walk beside me always. :)

6... I don't like this situation when I have nothing to do in the office. I have, actually... Doing my filing before the academic weeks start next Thursday. I still haven't received any notes from any of course leaders.

7... I keep on checking our university portal ( my own portal) just to check my students' results. I get worried, I really want to know how they did in their final exams.

8... Sukhoi jets just fled away, above our office building. Rehearsal for this coming Malaysia Day Celebration. It will be a stunning air performance by the Air Force, I guess.. Sukhoi and Hawk will take part this coming Monday.

9... I have nothing to type.. Running off with ideas. By the way, I parked my car far away from my office as I just couldn't stand with the traffic jammed this morning. They closed certain roads for the full rehearsal today. And I was wet because it was raining, but not heavy, and I don't have any umbrellas. *sigh*

10... many conflicts in here. And I just keeping my ears and eyes open wide, and not going to interfere in any personal conflicts arise among them.

11... it's 3 minutes before 5pm. It's time to go home and MY WEEKEND PARADISE BEGINS!!!!!!!!

I feel the nerve....

Browsing some of the blog just to find info on how they will conduct the interview and what are the question that they probably will ask... Guess what, super-duper I don't know which level are those questions taken off... Seriously it got my nerve... Rasa nak pengsan tengok soalan...

Now  wonder what will happen to me during the interview in the next 2 weeks.... That's my weakness, I mean, my major weakness.

Hilang mood

Pendek jak kali tok.... Datang haid time bekerja buat aku sikda mood. Banyak banyak tandas, tandas nak ku pakey ya juak mok direbut. Aku gik busy busy dalam jamban, pun mok berebut.. Masuklah tandas sebelah... Mun sik pun, suruh management polah sigek tandas khas untuk ko... Muka jak cantik, tapi otak letak kat lutut.  Mok ku baling ko pakey modes aku kah? Rasa nak ku tikam kat ko jak pad ya.... Bodo.

I hate it when......

I just came out from the kitchen's office to take some drink.. And when I went to the the sink, guess what??? It was clogged with waste... Rice... After eating, why don't just throw the waste into the rubbish bin? Why must throw it away into the sink? It looks terrible for me. Don't they teach you at home on how to keep the sink hygiene??

 

It looks like this.. You just have to add in rice there....

 Don't expect the tea lady to do all the job. You eat, you throw your own left over into the bin, and you clear what you have been used.... make it a habit. I'm not used to see all these things. I'm glad that I've been taught well by my family on this kitchen's hygiene.

So close....

So close, yet so far..... Cross-finger and hoping and praying for the best!

 

I guess it's the time to put the trust in Him. Have faith.!

Not bragging... But I'm totally thankful with this.

Today @ 2.06pm 11th September 2013... I've been sitting for this exam for about 3 times. Only at the 3rd exam I passed. And now stage 2. I got this today.

MOON ZAPPA **** *****
No. KP : 861017******
Tuan/Puan,

PANGGILAN TEMU DUGA PEGAWAI TADBIR DAN DIPLOMATIK GRED M41 (JABATAN PERKHIDMATAN AWAM MALAYSIA)

Dengan segala hormatnya perkara di atas adalah dirujuk.

2.   Tuan/Puan adalah dijemput menghadiri temu duga bagi jawatan yang tersebut di bawah pada tarikh, masa dan tempat temu duga seperti berikut:

TARIKH/MASA	KOD	JAWATAN	TEMPAT TEMU DUGA
26/09/2013 10:00 pagi	1609	PEGAWAI TADBIR DAN DIPLOMATIK GRED M41	PUSAT TEMU DUGA, SURUHANJAYA PERKHIDMATAN AWAM MALAYSIA,TINGKAT 3 BGN STALLION,SUBLOT 17,ROCK COMMERCIAL CENTRE BATU 1 1/2,JLN ROCK,93200 KUCHING

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*
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7.   Sila cetak dan bawa bersama emel ini semasa temu duga sebagai bukti.

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“BERSAMA MENGGALAS TRANSFORMASI”

Urus Setia Bahagian Pengambilan
b.p Setiausaha
Suruhanjaya Perkhidmatan Awam Malaysia
Aras 6-10, Blok C7, Kompleks C,
Pusat Pentradbiran Kerajaan Persekutuan,
62520 PUTRAJAYA.

I'm hoping for the best of it although people keep on telling me the chance is very small. I'll keep on being positive. God is here. If it is really meant to be mine, it will be mine. If not, there will be something else for me. I put my faith on you, God.... I pray for it.

Miraculously, I don't put this on my Facebook. I don't want anyone who knows me know about it except for my family members. But I publish it in here and I realize that the whole world will read it and I am sure, just a few, in other words, I can count those who knows me that reading this page. I feel joy today, with full blessing and feeling blessed and very grateful.

And I'm not bragging... I just want to express and share it with you.... :)

To give or not to give... To join or not to join

Ya ya ya... It's one of the simplest thing on earth that a human can do, but I just can't decide. It's tough, hard... To give or not to give, to join or not to join, I will always be the one that people will talk around.. Hot issue! Hahahaha! I don't really give it a damn.... It just that I feel torn in between. If I give and join, I'm afraid that people will say that I'm still into him.. If I say no and not joining, they will probably say that I hate him and still into him... Gossshhhhhhhhhh... That's totally crap. 

Ya, to be honest I feel sorry for myself for having myself related to him. If only I could turn back time, I just want to undo anything.

 I don't hate him, it just that SAYA MENYESAL KERANA MENSIA-SIAKAN ZAMAN DI MANA SAYA SEPATUTNYA BOLEH MENYERLAH DENGAN CEMERLANG IN TERMS OF EDUCATION, MY SOCIAL LIFE AND OTHER THINGS. 

And I guess, this is the deepest regret that I have in my life.

I have.... September 11, 2013

I have nothing to share, nothing to type and I guess I'll be typing another junk after this. Realizing that the cubicle behind me is empty, as the person who owned the cubicle is on leave today, I feel comfortable typing here. No one sees, maaaaaaa.... :)

Later going to send off my friend to the airport. Another one hour to go. Goshhhhhhh.... I was talking to my cousin yesterday about my wedding. Nahhhhh, not getting married that soon...

 I told her, " I guess there will be a slight problem if I were getting married..."

Cousin," Why?"

Me," You know, the reception things and the wedding itself. Our family sangat besar.."

Cousin, " Ya.. and you can't excluded any of them..."

Me," That's why... I guess I'll be having atleast 5 wedding receptions for our side. One will be held in my mom's kampung, one will be at my father's home, one's will be at my foster family's home, one will be at your home, and one will be at hotel.. Hotel oklah.. Everyone will be invited. Those who can't make it to the hotel, they can come to any one of the receptions that we are going to held..."

Cousin, " True.. Don't forget my father's family too.. Anjang abang, usu, Kak Love, Kak Mel, Kak Nora..."

Me, " And that receptions do not include my husband's. I wonder from husband's side, how many reception will be held for us... It's going to take up a lot of costs... Ish ish ish...."

Cousin, " Kasih laki dik, waiiiii...." (which means pity your future husband...)

And we broke into laughed... My goodness, "It's too far grand from any royals wedding or artists..."

But then, when it comes to serious thinking, I really need to held a big wedding ceremony... At least 2 or 3... 2 receptions is a must have, and the 3rd one will be depending on the current situation. It should be one wedding occasion at the church (church wedding) and one for the reception. And the reception will have to be a big event... 

What a life.........

September 9th, 2013

I pray that everything will go smoothly today. Dear God, keep us away from all dangers and evils in this world. Keep us closer to you. Send your blessing upon us. Send your Guardian Angel to watch over us. I hope to end my day with a great smile today. I ask this through Christ Our Lord. Amen.